This chapter nailed me. I often speak from the passive perspective of not being able to do things because of so much on my plate or “having” to do things. When, really, I have choices. There are things that concern me that I don’t have any control over, at least right now. Reactive people respond to these things that concern them, even if it is beyond their influence, because that is they way they function. That’s how I function.
But if I’m proactive, my influence may expand to the point that I can affect some of those things that are now out of my control.
Covey gives some exercises that I’m going to do to help us become more proactive. I don’t know how much good they’ll be without reading the book, but they may be worth thinking about if you feel like life is happening to you instead of you really living.
For a full day, listen to your language and to the language of the people around you. How often do you use and hear reactive phrases such as ‘If only,’ ‘I can’t,’ or ‘I have to’?
Identify an experience you might encounter in the near future where, based on past experience, you would probably behave reactively. Review the situation in the context of your Circle of Influence. How could you respond proactively?
Select a problem from your work or personal life that is frustrating to you. Determine whether it is a direct, indirect, or no control problem. Identify the first step you can take in your Circle of Influence to try to solve it and then take that step.
Try the thirty-day test of proactivity. Be aware of the change in your Circle of Influence. (You’ll probably need the book for this one)
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